last night's dinner was yummilicious...din know that fangnian can cook so well. i was very impressed indeed. i was even more impressed by esther's waffles. it was so so so GOOD. and her waffle machine makes waffles in the shape of penguins!! so cute. the penguins has a little dip in its tummy for ice-cream. *grinz* the waffle tasted good even just on its own...add in cookie-and-cream ice cream, strawberries and bananas, and alittlebitofchoc, oooh...it can be sold at a cafe. i think next time when we are all sick of physio, we can open a cafe together. germ and esther can do the dessert, i'd do the main courses...and gin can be our financial manager and PR manager. haha...yet another far far away dream...

we stayed at fangnian's place until like 1+ am. what did we do? we chatted...from BGR to bible stories, from alicia's new boots to clubbing, from horseriding to ski-ing. we talked, we laughed...and all in all, we had lotsa fun. oh, and i discovered yet another of fangnian's hidden talent - he can play guitar. FWAH, i am getting more impressed with him already.

then, esther drove us back to university place. alicia stayed over and we stayed up looking at photos on my comp and chatted even more. i think we both fell asleep at abt 3am. her dad called at 7.30am, a morning call to wake her up so she can go to church. but she was so exhausted, she decided to go to esther's church on lygon (instead of her usual church somewhere in the suburb). so both of us slept in till like 10am...then had my muffins for breakfast. when she left, i felt a shallow sense of desolation creeping in..

but luckily, i met jf online. and we chatted for hours. been quite a while since we chatted so much...and it was so much fun. he is going back to sg tomorrow!! sighz...and then i guess he and edwin would meet up with weipeng, eugene, peileng and andrew. the CS gang...which had been torn apart and scattered around the world. wish i can be back home and meeting up with them...rather than stuck in cold, windy melbourne.

initial D opening in singapore/asia in 4 days!! darn, never wanted to be back in singapore so much this year. it's so hard when everyone else is back there and i am here. fighting off that familiar sense of abandonment...keeping myself sane by watching my fav sitcom, F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

germ coming back to melb in less than a week. guess ken must be looking forward to sat morning so much right now. as for me, can't wait to bake more of the muffins for germ to try...and also can't wait to see what she got me from hong kong *smirk*
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已经冰封的回忆，开始解冻。
那段快乐的时光，开始重演。
断断续续的想念，开始蔓延。
曾经按耐的感情，开始震动。

当一切变得模糊不清，复杂的情绪成为负担。
动了心，就无法装着不在乎。
就算把心冻僵了，它依旧蠢蠢欲动。
一旦有稍微的温差，就会如暴风雨一样，
把原本平静的内心，摧毁得满目疮痍。

感动不是心动，不可以相提并论。
感动代表的是感激，是感谢。
心动包含了动情的无助，那种小鹿乱撞的感觉。
有感动，会想要报恩。
有心动，就会有期待。
两者完全不一样，不要混淆了。

有时候，回忆是我的避风港，让我远离现实的残酷。
有时候，回忆却是我的地狱，让我受尽了百般痛苦。
逃进自己的回忆，是懦弱，是逃避现实。
抛弃自己的回忆，是无奈，是走投无路。

有感动，因为我很感激。
没有心动，没有等待，也没有期待。
负担很重，很想卸下来。
内心很乱，很想静下来。

怎么变得这么复杂？怎么变成这样混乱？
怎么虽然如愿以偿，却成为了一场醒不来的恶梦？