杰伦的旧歌，我好像太久没有听了。
这一晚，听着一些曾经伴着我大学时代的歌曲，听到了他的“回到过去”
让我突然好希望自己真的可以回到过去。
想回到过去
不是因为过去比较美丽，
只因为现在太难熬。
不是为了重温旧梦，
是为了弥补过错。
不想要重蹈覆辙，
所以我想回到过去。
试着让故事继续
太渴望的结局，离我越来越远。
不想要的种种，却越来越多。
从前的故事里，或许我有孤独的时候，
但至少孤独时落下的泪，
不会那么苦，那么痛。
至少不再让你离我而去
‘你’指的不是一个人。
或许它代表了我所失去的一些东西，
也许在形容我的某些心情。
只知道那些失去了的人，事，物，
我都已经无法挽回
分散时间的注意
让时间慢下来，我好想停步喘气。
天天都莫名其妙的过了，
累的身体无法休息，
疲倦的头脑快要罢工了。
这次会抱得更紧
已经不再身边的朋友，
我很遗憾在分开的时候，
没有好好的抱抱他们。
如今，虽然科技发达，我们的距离却似乎越来越遥远。
这样挽留不知还来不来得及
我知道已经错过的，不管如何挽留，
时间已久毫不留情地把它们带走，
只剩下遗憾与后悔的伤痕。
~想回到过去~
有一些事情，自己越知道理亏，却越生气。
无理取闹的当下，虽然明知自己在任性，可是那一口气，怎么咽都咽不下。
气在头上时，什么话都听不进。
只想大吵大闹，要把全世界的人都当成罪人，心里才稍稍好一些些。
气消后，留下的只有惭愧。
又不争气了。
不哭不哭！
可是，眼泪滴滴答答。
我常说自己好累。
现在，我不是累，
因为我已经没有力气，没有能力去感觉了。
麻麻地，呆呆地。
也只有头里面的抽痛才提醒了我其实还活着。
也许疼痛，就是这样的作用。
it's way past my bedtime on a friday night
i am beyond fatigue from the hectic and crazy week
why am i blogging?
because my hair dryer broke down and i am waiting for my hair to dry -_-
so...
since there is this craze going round on facebook called "25 random things"
and although i've already done it on facebook...
i need something to keep me awake till my hair is dry...
therefore..i present to anyone who is still reading my blog...
X number of things you may or may not want to know about Ni Shiyin Gretel
1) my favourite stuffed animal toy are elephants. I dunno why...just thought that they look really cute and cuddly :D (but i go ga-ga over most stuffed toys anyway....)
2) i once took part in Talentime in primary school with 3 other female classmates...we sang 早安老师 and our group came in first :D
3) my first job (as in got CPF contribution) is relief teaching Biology in my JC for 5 months.
4) my second job is being therapy assistant at AH for 5 months.
5) i've fainted a total of 3 times so far in my life. 1st time in my second job, 2nd time at Escape themepark and 3rd time in my kitchen.
6) due to point number 5, i actually have a phobia of feeling giddy.
7) ironically, despite point number 6, i feel giddy very easily...and i get motion sickness in cars and buses. so basically, i live in fear most of the time
8) i used to idolise doctors. I don't anymore...why? you don't want to get me started
9) i went on 2 trips in australia with 3 very good guy friends. being the only gal means i get taken care of very well :D
10) i never wanted to study overseas...if not for the fact that there isn't a undergrad physio course in Singapore...and i manage to get a scholarship, i probably would have gone to NUS, did Biology and is now a teacher...
11) I don't watch horror movies anymore after watching The Ring (original Jap version). I still get freaked out when i see wells...
12) i fall down quite a fair bit when i was younger. Some of the more major falls include falling face flat on an unpaved road in Malaysia, falling off from the top of the double deck bed and falling off a sea saw when i was on the top.
13) I used to climb trees (in Singapore) when i was a kid..and i did better than my brother *muahahahaha*
14) My childhood dream is to become a figure skater...i am nowhere near that dream...
15) my earliest memory is of waiting for my mum to fetch my brother home from kingdergarten..and i wait by this little window in the living room cos i get to see my mum and brother walking back..i was about 2.5 years old
16) i think i am tone-deaf, but sadly for my friends who KTV with me, i love to sing...
17) i used to cycle with my dad from bukit batok to ghim moh for breakfast every weekend...and there was one time after breakfast, we cycled from ghim moh to chin swee road (near clarke quay) to buy kuey chup, and then cycled back to bukit batok.
18) i don't really like to sleep in an air-con room cos it makes my nose mucous membrane too dry and that hurts. prefer to sleep in a well-ventilated room with natural wind or a fan (like my own room)
19) i have poor tolerance for repeated behaviors which i deem as childish/attention seeking...and that has earned me the reputation for being too stern or not empathetising...thing is, once or twice is enough...keep doing it all the time and it just gets irritating!
20) my bolster is also known as my crying kaki...although i think it's really more like my giant tissue soaking up all the tears...
21) i've decided not to give my children (if i have any) English names. They can choose their own...and if they get ridiculed cos they choose a silly name, it's not my fault *haha*
22) i had my first taste of alcoholic drink (stout) when i was about 8 years old...had my first sake when i was 14 years old...had my first beer when i was 19 years old...had my first wine when i was 20 years old...had my first 'shot' when i was 21 years old...
23) i do not like alcohol despite above point
24) i learnt to play mahjong when i was in sec one (taught by my brother) using mahjong CARDS.
25) my hair is now dry so i can go sleep...
there u go...
another 25 things that i shared..
this is actually pretty fun..
maybe can share another 25 things on another night when i wait for my hair to dry...
~supine position is the best for the abled body~
i am beyond fatigue from the hectic and crazy week
why am i blogging?
because my hair dryer broke down and i am waiting for my hair to dry -_-
so...
since there is this craze going round on facebook called "25 random things"
and although i've already done it on facebook...
i need something to keep me awake till my hair is dry...
therefore..i present to anyone who is still reading my blog...
X number of things you may or may not want to know about Ni Shiyin Gretel
1) my favourite stuffed animal toy are elephants. I dunno why...just thought that they look really cute and cuddly :D (but i go ga-ga over most stuffed toys anyway....)
2) i once took part in Talentime in primary school with 3 other female classmates...we sang 早安老师 and our group came in first :D
3) my first job (as in got CPF contribution) is relief teaching Biology in my JC for 5 months.
4) my second job is being therapy assistant at AH for 5 months.
5) i've fainted a total of 3 times so far in my life. 1st time in my second job, 2nd time at Escape themepark and 3rd time in my kitchen.
6) due to point number 5, i actually have a phobia of feeling giddy.
7) ironically, despite point number 6, i feel giddy very easily...and i get motion sickness in cars and buses. so basically, i live in fear most of the time
8) i used to idolise doctors. I don't anymore...why? you don't want to get me started
9) i went on 2 trips in australia with 3 very good guy friends. being the only gal means i get taken care of very well :D
10) i never wanted to study overseas...if not for the fact that there isn't a undergrad physio course in Singapore...and i manage to get a scholarship, i probably would have gone to NUS, did Biology and is now a teacher...
11) I don't watch horror movies anymore after watching The Ring (original Jap version). I still get freaked out when i see wells...
12) i fall down quite a fair bit when i was younger. Some of the more major falls include falling face flat on an unpaved road in Malaysia, falling off from the top of the double deck bed and falling off a sea saw when i was on the top.
13) I used to climb trees (in Singapore) when i was a kid..and i did better than my brother *muahahahaha*
14) My childhood dream is to become a figure skater...i am nowhere near that dream...
15) my earliest memory is of waiting for my mum to fetch my brother home from kingdergarten..and i wait by this little window in the living room cos i get to see my mum and brother walking back..i was about 2.5 years old
16) i think i am tone-deaf, but sadly for my friends who KTV with me, i love to sing...
17) i used to cycle with my dad from bukit batok to ghim moh for breakfast every weekend...and there was one time after breakfast, we cycled from ghim moh to chin swee road (near clarke quay) to buy kuey chup, and then cycled back to bukit batok.
18) i don't really like to sleep in an air-con room cos it makes my nose mucous membrane too dry and that hurts. prefer to sleep in a well-ventilated room with natural wind or a fan (like my own room)
19) i have poor tolerance for repeated behaviors which i deem as childish/attention seeking...and that has earned me the reputation for being too stern or not empathetising...thing is, once or twice is enough...keep doing it all the time and it just gets irritating!
20) my bolster is also known as my crying kaki...although i think it's really more like my giant tissue soaking up all the tears...
21) i've decided not to give my children (if i have any) English names. They can choose their own...and if they get ridiculed cos they choose a silly name, it's not my fault *haha*
22) i had my first taste of alcoholic drink (stout) when i was about 8 years old...had my first sake when i was 14 years old...had my first beer when i was 19 years old...had my first wine when i was 20 years old...had my first 'shot' when i was 21 years old...
23) i do not like alcohol despite above point
24) i learnt to play mahjong when i was in sec one (taught by my brother) using mahjong CARDS.
25) my hair is now dry so i can go sleep...
there u go...
another 25 things that i shared..
this is actually pretty fun..
maybe can share another 25 things on another night when i wait for my hair to dry...
~supine position is the best for the abled body~
people have been complaining about this silly bird that starts to 'squeal' before dawn...
therefore waking them up at unearthly hours..
i rather tolerate some silly bird than to wake up to some foreign workers banging a piece of metal against another piece of metal
sure sure..
it's for upgrading so that next time i can walk from my block to another block without getting caught in the rain..
but for goodness sake, it's a SATURDAY!!!
ok, fine...
i slept in so the banging didn't start till like...8am..
but for someone who has been sleep-deprived due to many reasons,
8am is unearthly on a weekend lor...
it's been more than a month ago since the last saturday when i can sleep in as late as i want...
but no no,
someone up there isn't gonna give me that kind of luxury eh?
sigh...but at least i did manage to get some kind of sleep in between the bouts of banging
had to get up eventually because need to go toilet...so at least i am less sleep deprived, but still poorly rested
what has a girl gotta do to get some quality rest eh?
can't even rest properly in my own room...
this world is getting too absurd...
and a few people around me are also behaving in a rather...weird way
saying things which makes people worry but they ask me not to worry...
doing things which are not the smartest thing to do but they still do it anyway...
what's with the world?!
hmm...
or maybe i am the one who is being weird...
gah...
i think a vacation is a very good idea...
and it better be at a place with no banging and no silly birds...
~sian diao~
therefore waking them up at unearthly hours..
i rather tolerate some silly bird than to wake up to some foreign workers banging a piece of metal against another piece of metal
sure sure..
it's for upgrading so that next time i can walk from my block to another block without getting caught in the rain..
but for goodness sake, it's a SATURDAY!!!
ok, fine...
i slept in so the banging didn't start till like...8am..
but for someone who has been sleep-deprived due to many reasons,
8am is unearthly on a weekend lor...
it's been more than a month ago since the last saturday when i can sleep in as late as i want...
but no no,
someone up there isn't gonna give me that kind of luxury eh?
sigh...but at least i did manage to get some kind of sleep in between the bouts of banging
had to get up eventually because need to go toilet...so at least i am less sleep deprived, but still poorly rested
what has a girl gotta do to get some quality rest eh?
can't even rest properly in my own room...
this world is getting too absurd...
and a few people around me are also behaving in a rather...weird way
saying things which makes people worry but they ask me not to worry...
doing things which are not the smartest thing to do but they still do it anyway...
what's with the world?!
hmm...
or maybe i am the one who is being weird...
gah...
i think a vacation is a very good idea...
and it better be at a place with no banging and no silly birds...
~sian diao~
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