i'm back

ok, now my little break seems like a big scam huh? probably got people thinking,"aiyer, where got so fast then ok one? take break only to gain attention huh?"

ehh, lemme think. i am pleasently surprised by the number of people asking me why i have stopped blogging. i'll be lying if i said i am not happy that i have faithful readers out there.

i can hear some people chanting L.O.S.E.R. now.

but i mean,if i didn't stop writing, how would i know who would miss me when i am gone yah?

anywayz,since i've stopped writing in my blog, i've been tempted time and again to write. from freaky dreams to funny dialouges, heart-wrenching moments in clinics to OMGyummyhotchocolate at kokoblack. and i've kept saying "NO" to myself, cos i'm not out of my deep pit of self-pity+depression yet.

then,yesterday, dreamy said to me,"you don't have to care what other people think when they read your blog. it's YOUR blog, you write what you want to write."

hmmm....i guess my lifelong problem is this obsession with gaining acceptance from my peers. like,i want to write funny & happy things so people reading it would think "wah,gretel so funny! i wanna be her friend!"

i hear the LOSER chants again

so,when i realised i can't seem to get my head around to writing something happy/funny/inspiring, i thought i should stop writing before all my friends decide i am a gone-case maniac and "dun want to friend me anymore".

LOSER LOSER LOSER...yes yes,i admit. that's me...i am a big fat L.O.S.E.R.

and,sadly, this big fat LOSER is back! to spoon out more depression and moan and groan about the loneliness and unfairness of her teeny sad world.

i guess it's too much to ask for a welcoming round of applause huh...

anyhow,i'm gonna start blogging again. and this time round, i am going to listen to dreamy's advice. It's MY blog, and i'll..ermm...write watever i want to!

to end of this blog, gonna put up the lyrics of a song...

一个人生活

叶子在窗外轻轻摇动，人行道没有行人走过。
镜子里的我很不像我，自从你离开了我变得很冷漠。
你的影子在每一个角落，好像是在提醒着我，
少了你的陪伴，我现在有多寂寞。

我想我可以习惯一个人生活，我想我可以假装不曾爱过
冰凉的夜里让眼泪温热我。
我想我可以习惯一个人生活，在记忆里面擦去你的承诺
爱你怎么会是这个结果？

我想我可以习惯一个人生活，我想我可以假装不曾爱过
感觉如果要走谁能说No
我想我可以习惯一个人生活，在记忆里面擦去你的承诺
爱情是个梦而我睡过头。