bad news galore

if i thot life was crappy for me yesterday,it sure is doubly crappy today.yesterday, the guy who wanted my apt backed out,so i cannot move in with germaine this week. today, the proposal for a group assignment i have to do is rejected and my group has to redo it. and last but least,the news of yet another long and tiring group assignment coming up. oh,on top of everything else,i've got clinic coming up,so how on earth am i going to squeeze all these group assignments into all the worries of not being able to move out and stress of facing nasty supervisors for 6 weeks??

geez,i feel like crap...

or as Rachel puts it in one the F.R.I.E.N.D.S. episode "...i thoughy i hit rock bottom.but today it's like rock bottom, fifty feet of crap...then me." only for me,it feels more like thousand feet of crap,500 feet of junk,250 feet of garbage...then me.

and the fact that i have to spend every day and night alone for an unknown period of time just adds another million ton boulder onto my already breaking shoulder.

i never felt the need to scream and hide in a corner to cry so much.i wish i can disappear and escape from all these stuff.somebody,HELP!!!!!

i can already feel the fingers of depression slowly grabbing my ankles and one day,it would pull me down into that endless whirlpool of fear and anxiety,tears and sadness until eventually,somehow..i manage to crawl my way out...exhausted and battered,carrying all the scars from being thrown around in that horrible whirlpool.

germaine says i am pessimistic...well,i really dun see the point of being optimistic and getting my hopes up,only to end up with my hopes thrown onto my face like some rotten eggs and only i am left to clear up the mess.

keep my hopes low..at least when the worst happen,i am just stepping in the mess rather than having it all over my face...

and if by some miracle,the best does occur,i'll feel happy and glad that the worst din happen.

but miracles dun happen...not to me anyway.

so...bad news,bad weather,bad hair day. how much more crap is going to be thrown on top of me? :<