by right, i should continue day 3 in taiwan...
but right now, i am in pain..
and in a dilemna (i think i spelt the word wrongly...)
and in a rather lousy mood...

despite a day in, trying to relax and watching many missed episodes of 康熙来了 on youtube...
somehow...
seeing a picture on facebook made my day crashed to rock bottom..
i guess u can call it envy...
and some would say that it's time i learn to

"accept the past, treasure the present, embrace the future"
(cannot remember who said it to me...or did i make it up myself....?)

i know, logically, such 'envy' shouldn't happen
not when it's a closed chapter...
yet, i guess the 'envy' arise because i asked myself 'why not me?'
that's the emotion speaking...not logic..
because i know that if it had been me, then i wouldn't be who i am today...
and if it happens to me now, i wouldn't want it anyway...

so i guess, it's the right thing, wrong time...
but i am glad that the right thing did happen...and to the right person...at the right time...
(at least i hope that's the case for those involved)
although i want to just wave the picture away from my mind and 'treasure the present'...
facing the way i am feeling now is probably essential for me to 'embrace the future'...
gotta learn to let it go..let it go...let it be....let it be...

yes, i've accepted the past...now i'll just have to stop re-visiting it...

sometimes, things like friendster and facebook makes life easier...
to stay in touch...
but it also makes life harder..
cos inadvertently (i spelt wrongly again??), things you don't wanna know get splashed right in front of you when you login...

bleah...

on a night like this...
it's such coincidence that there's noone online whom i can talk to...

the feeling starts with an 'L'
and the action starts with a 'C'

i'm talking gibberish again...
that's how much pain i am in...

~panadol & youtube to the rescue~