11.33pm
strangely peaceful house...
as i sit here and listen to a soothing song...
i find myself travelling back to many years ago...
when i used to think that humans change for the better...
if you give them a chance..or rather, if you keep giving them chances...

the past 2 months...
it doesn't feel like i am coming home after work
on the surface, things look fine...
but it is not...
and some of us choose to ignore..
some of us choose to take it out on others...
and some of us...
just let it happen and try not to get affected...

just 2 more weeks...
then i can escape from this madness for 14 days...
away and hopefully, temporarily forget...
a walk along the yarra...
chilling out in starbucks...
salsa-ing or cheong-K-ing...
fancy dinner or bumming in front of tv...
anything but facing this at home...

an obligation to stay and brace through...
no choice...
can't even choose to run away and escape...
a responsibility i dun wish to take...
a task that's so impossible to accomplish...
a debt i have to pay...
karma...
i must have not done enough good deeds...
or...
someone must have done me too huge a favour some lifetime(s) ago..
and now...
i have to pay...

turn left..turn right..
look up...look around..
me, jay chou and my toshiba..
a friend online...and the many faces smiling at me from the photos around...
if i just ignore the sleeping form in the living room...
and pretend that daylight will never come..
i might actually feel contented...

but he lies there...
waiting...
when daybreak comes (or maybe even before dawn)..
the cycle would repeat...
again..and again...and again..
day after day...year after year...

i wish daylight will never come..
i wish i'll never wake up once i am asleep...
i wish it can be like this...
me, jay chou, toshiba and msn...
and this peace...
no fighting..no shouting...
no more tears...no more anger..no more grief...