today...is officially the worst day i have experienced so far...
why? why?!
because i am still fuming mad at last night's bahkwa fiasco...
details of which shall remain a family dark secret...
but i was pissed...
so pissed that i decided i dun want to eat bah kwa!
(yeah right..i dun want to eat cos i got sore throat lah...)

and then, early in the morning, i got an sms from somebody
asking me to meet tonight so we can pass our stuff to each other...
considering i emailed him on saturday...
the least he can do is to give me a few more days to prepare right?
meet tomorrow...or wednesday...i can handle...
but today! so rushed!!
i am in a bad mood...
then, i read something else....
in the sms, he said he can't find any of my stuff at his place...
wth...
i am damn sure, guarantee+chop i got stuff left there lor..
cannot find...
yeah right..more like too lazy to find or basically already incinerated...
darn...
what happen to common decency??
by the time i was on the mrt...
a headache has started pounding...

and then, i got horrible cramps.
no need to elaborate abt the cramps..
slept all the way to novena...
then...
i am also hit by giddy spells...
which basically cause me to work at about half my usual efficiency...
and also, repetitive cold sweats...
leaving me very close to fainting in the ICU
cos i could hardly breathe through the mask...
in the wards, my patients all look at me quizzically...
when i allow them to rest...instead of pushing them to walk further..
not because they are tired..
but because i was so dizzy...
i didn't wanna risk letting my patient fall...
i think all my patients are wondering what good luck has befallen onto them today...
the 'physio-terrorist' is lenient today!

by the time i reutrn to the office at the end of the day...
i was inalotofpain, extremelyexhausted, scowling&frowning...
slept on mrt again...ended with neck ache and worse giddiness...
came home...
got scolded for coming online...
then, somebody asked me 'later u coming down? or just ur dad?'
wth...
come up cannot meh?!
what happened to common decency?!!?!?!?
nvm that..still insisting cannot find anything i left...
fine...benefit of the doubt..
maybe his mum threw them out without him knowing...watever...
then...told my mum wat he said abt coming down...
she said 'tell him i wanna see him'
i replied 'ah, u see him lor. i'll be in my room..dun feel like seeing him'
(because i might just BITE HIS HEAD OFF!)
wat reply did i get??
神经病!
wah..win already lor...
my mum say i am crazy because of somebody
i seriously think this daughter of hers really have no significance...
and then...she scolded me again for coming online!!
so i told her 'i'm in a bad mood lah. cannot play on the Internet abit meh?'
(okie..so i was rude to her...sorrie mummy)
well...
of course i want to come online lah..
at least people i talk to online will not say i am crazy when i dun want to see somebody
and..at least i'll get some virtual hugs online...
what do i get in real life??
scoldings...scoldings...scoldings...
and a whole lot of anger!!

and now, i am sitting here...
wondering when the hell is the pain going to go away...
and when the hell is the giddiness gonna subside...
suddenly realised 13 march is such a lousy day for me...
was lousy last year...
still lousy this year...
one year liaoz lor...
single, depressed and unwanted...
sighz...
sleeping now will be a good escape from the harsh reality later...
but...
gotta face it...
and i really really need to move on...

it's time for closure...
it's time...
to close that chapter of my life...
the end...