time is like sand,slipping through my fingers

my room is infested with mosquitoes.irritating blood-sucking creatures buzzing around my ears for the whole night. i hid under my blanket,only to start sweating...i came out of my blanket,only to be a giant buffet for these yucky insects. somebody, HELP!!!

as the sun peeps into my room this morning,and as i finally start to drift out of a restless sleep from the scratching and itching, i start to realise i only have less than 2 weeks left in sunny singapore. then it's back to cold and gloomy melbourne...back to the headache of trying to rent out my CS apt..and to the back-breaking job of moving from CS to Collins Street. Part of me want to duck under my pillow and will time to stop right here,right now.

my time back in sg so far has been pretty good.aside from being breakfast for dozens of mosquitoes,i had fun so far. the "chalet" and the trip to Wild Wild Wet(the new water themepark), watching movies (harry potter and Shrek2) and spending time with han wei...the only 2 giant boulders hanging on my shoulder are the 2 assignments due in july.wish i can wave a magic wand and make them go away.this week is gonna be yet another activities-filled week of assignments and a trip to malaysia to visit my relatives. and han wei is coming with me! yayy! at least when my mum cannot stop chatting with my aunts and uncles,i have someone to talk to. but still,the load of 2 unfinished assignments hang over me...i am crumbling under the pressure...help!!

3 weeks back home seems like 3 days...with each passing moment,the sick feeling in my stomach wells up higher my digestive tract,threatening to perform an anti-gravity stunt with the 3 roti-pratas i had for breakfast. whenever i think of the apt in CS,my mood drops to a new record low for the month. while part of me knows that at least i would be moving in with germaine, and i am excited abt that...a huge part of me knows that when i step onto that plane that would fly me back to melbourne, part of my heart would start to bleed from the separation that cuts me right through and tortures me for the next few months before i step onto this sunny island again.

now i understand why germaine din wanna come back. because although the three weeks with han wei was wonderful,the three weeks with my parents is pure bliss..what comes after the three weeks is just so awful that sometimes,i wish i dun have to go through it. wish i have the will to actually say i dun wanna come back..but i dun. the lure of the yummy food my mummy cooks and the loving arms of han wei makes me want to come back home. yet with each return, every departure cuts me deeper than before. by the time i graduate,i would be just a bloody mess of cut up flesh. ewwwww!!

i'm like a moth to a candle flame. it hurts bloody bad to keep throwing myself into the burning wick, yet i cannot resist the temptation.

1.5 years to go...seems so short..but feels so long.
sighz....